So Sorry For Your Loss

2019

I frequent estate sales. I often am looking for practical items like aluminum foil or Ohio Blue Tip Matches, but I also often purchase stationery. Most estate salers will charge about $1 for a greeting card, but I've found that offering to buy all the paper products without sorting through them at all often fetches me an excellent price. I then spend an afternoon or two sorting through several file boxes. I keep some of the stationery for correspondence, pass some along to others, and use some for bookbinding.

At one estate sale, I found several boxes of custom thank-you-for-your-sympathy cards among a variety of monogrammed items. I spent a lot of time thinking about how much grief a person has to go through that they buy this sort of card in bulk.

The Far Flung Forest is held off the grid with the exception of a payphone. For this project, I used Twilio to build a simple voicemail recording that, when called, asked the listener to reflect on a loss, then write about it in one of the cards.


A small box with a phone number printed on it sat next to a jar of quarters by the payphone. The participant would dial the phone number, using the quarters to pay for the call.

A simple Twilio answering machine played a recording about grief, and invited them to close the chapter on a loss. Opening the box revealed a small pile of cards, a pen, and a small, hand-bound book.

After writing, the participant read the book, which invited them to seal their envelope and return it to the box, or leave their envelope unsealed. Leaving the envelope unsealed would allow them to read the contents of any other unsealed envelopes in the box, while sealing the envelope would end the experience.

After the event, I waited for the next full moon. The night after, as the moon began to wane, I set up a small altar on my front porch. I read any unsealed cards one more time, sent wishes for relief and ease to each writer, and burned the cards. I buried the ashes under a tree in my front yard.